Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Bucket List



I know what some of you are thinking, bucket lists Carla. Are you dying? The answer is no, but I have recently discovered through my friends that they all have bucket lists. In fact they have this little document right up there with their wills. Now Carla is unfamiliar with bucket lists since she has lived under a rock for the last forty two years to know what exactly a bucket list is.

All my friends are in agreement when they told me this, a bucket list is a list of things you want to do before you die. Now most people don't make these lists unless they get the bad news they have some disease and the possibility of the grim reaper knocking at the door, hence forth why most people don't even think of the bucket list. But I have some eccentric friends and they live outside the box and recently their influences have me going outside my box.

I was wondering if this list is more than just a bucket list. And after listening to my friends opinions of why they have one while watching the kids by the pool on a hot summer day, I came to the conclusion these lists are more than just something we want to do before we die. I thought hard on this and this was my conclusion.

I think these bucket lists are more than what we want to do before we die, they are our dreams, desires, and what drives us to be creative in our lives. Remember when you were young and you were told you can do whatever you want when you grow up. The world is your oyster and you have the power to do whatever you want, well, somewhere along the way of the teen age years and college years they get lost. This is due to career choices, relationships, marriage, children, heck let's just say it, life in general.

As we get older we abandon the childish dreams we had and try to keep our head above the water for the fear of drowning in life's tidewater. Now that we are older and closer to an end we look back with regrets. You know what I mean, that little voice you're hearing right now that's saying I should have, when you did the other instead because of outside influences.

Now that the subject is brought up, you wonder did your bucket have a leak along the way, because mine sure did, as I think back. There's no need to be ashamed if you never thought of a bucket list. I never gave it much thought myself until, it was posed to me and I realized some of those dreams I always wanted to do was a form of a bucket list.

Before we move any further on the subject I want to say one thing about bucket lists, they are what you really would like to do. My one friend has on her bucket list, to sky dive nude if she can find a pilot interested in doing such. So far all of the pilots require clothing. While my one friend, who doesn't have a list by the way, has said she always wanted to spend the night on a remote island with George Clooney. Which do you think is more realistic? That's what bucket lists are realistic goals.

After sitting all day by the pool watching my darling kids and thinking back how many times Darrell had these wild dreams, which turns out weren't wild after all. I decided to come up with my own bucket list. A great list of realistic goals and possible one or two that maybe out of reach, but not really if you know who I am. I have also explained my reasoning, which is another good tip this is a realistic bucket list. By the way I'm changing the title "Bucket List" to "My Lifelong Wish List".

Here we go.

1. Fall in love again. Some people think I'm completely mad wanting this but if you know Carla, I am a romantic creature at heart. True love is an exhilarating feeling, better than any drug can give you. Not that I've tried drugs. I haven't, but I was given some meds after giving birth to a ten pound child that put me in la la land for a few days. Being in love makes you come alive. Imagine each gentle caress, the soft whispers, and searing touches. Imagine catching your breath when they walk in the room or your heart pounds when you think of them. Just laying your head, on their chest to hear their heart beat; magical. As humans we need love. Yes, with love sometimes comes arguments, disappointments, lies, deceit and anger, but to me the pros certainly out weigh the cons when it comes to love.

2. To walk the red carpet. Now it can be to one of my works or something a friend had done, but it is something that has been made into film. This is one thing I have always wanted to do since I was a teen. I even have in mind the dress I want to wear. That dress will be smoking hot black with a slit exposing my nice legs. Fake diamonds, since I can't afford the real ones. The necklace would ever so gently be dipping, almost pointing to my nice tan cleavage. I would be wearing the most gorgeous heels. Screw the doctor about not wearing high heels, for this occasion I intend on doing such and he can't stop me, unless the arthritis acts up, then I'll just pop some pills and go on my merry way.

3. Pose nude. Now don't get your knickers in a twist. It's not what you think. I don't want to pose for Playboy, please Hugh Hefner doesn't need to go into bankruptcy over me and I certainly won't do the vulgar Larry Flint either. I don't want a painting of me either. The idea an artist making my boobs look like sea monsters gone wild, would be hard to swallow. No, I want to be pinup style type of nude. Think Betty Paige, without the whips please. Now I have two reasons why I'm doing this, but my main reason is this. When I'm in the nursing home, I want this photo blown up and placed above my bed. I will be Miss Popular at the nursing home, while you other hens get snubbed. Sure my sex life will be shot to hell by then, but those men who thought I wasn't good enough when I was young will regret not checking it out before they made their decision to close that door.

4. To appear in Country Living magazine. I work hard for my house damn it. When my husband was alive we ripped the house completely apart and rebuilt it and were still building when he died. A widow woman, who took the plans of her dream home and fulfilled them in the midst of renovations to me, makes an interesting story, Sure the back story is, I cried, called the deceased husband names, chewed out and insulted people who didn't do their job and over extend the budget with my desires. At least nobody came off the ladder, cut their body with tin from installing the tin roof ourselves, electrocuted when changing out light fixtures or nail gunned themselves while putting siding on the house. It's a great house done with lots of love.

5. Take a lover. Now, I know this one caught lots of people off guard it caught me off guard as well. I figure if I don't fall in love, which is looking more what is going to happen. I will take a lover. Mind you I will do this much later when all prospects have petered out as they say. I've given myself an age limit when to find a lover. If I'm not in love by the time I'm forty five, I'm pulling the lover card out. Now I also have requirements for my lover. He must have a full head of hair (pony tails will not be accepted) and his teeth. No one with a criminal record, (i.e.: murder) or drug addicts or drunks. Please if you are over weight just keep walking. I know I'm not thin, but really the beer gut over the pants is not coming near me.

6. Ride a Harley. My husband would have been thrilled with me trying this one. He always tried to get me on a motorcycle and I always said no. Perhaps this is owed to him. Now, before anybody shows up in my drive way with your motor cycle, thinking I'm getting on; think again. I have a few stipulations. First, it must be only a Harley. No crotch rockets. If you have a significant other, stay away. The last thing I need is that person thinking odd things about us. I mean really, think about it, we are in an odd position. Another thing, I want a clean cut looking man. Remember in number 5 about qualifications for a lover? That's what I want. The last and foremost, don't you dare speed, because if we survive the speed thing, when I get off, you better have some damn good health insurance! You're going to need it.

7. One thing I would like to do is, get up one day, early morning, a feat in itself. Grab my duffel bag, throw some crap in it and then get in the car and just go. No place in particular just get up and go. No I wouldn't be answering my phone. In fact I would leave a little note for my kids to let them know I'm ok and I'm going to be gone a few days. I'd have my phone, it's a necessity in case I got lost, car accident, or car broke down. I'd have my phone in case of emergency. For the most part however I wouldn't use my phone. I'd drive anywhere to San Antonio to New Orleans. Whatever floats my fancy at the time.

8. Well, with all the above comes some reality. I would have to lose at least ten pounds to even contemplate the above mention. If you think I'm getting down to my skivvies, walking the red carpet, taking a lover, appearing in a national magazine, and ride a Harley with my legs nearly in the air, with this little bit of pudgy, think again. I have taken measurements and have discovered losing ten pounds will put me on the right path to gaining the above mention goals.

9. Writing my Biography. I would write my bio from the time I was a child to the time I'm old and have nothing more going on in my life. I would tell everything from my abuse as a child to my zany adventures as an adult. I would let people know its okay to be weak and vulnerable at times as long as determination and will power gave them strength to overcome obstacles. I would hope someone reading my bio would learn from my life's story as much as I had learned about myself.

There you have it, Carla's Life Long Wish List. Do you have a life long wish list? If not perhaps it's time for you to think about one.



Books by Carla Landreth
http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=carla+landreth


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